Celebrate the New Year by learning, letting go to make room for a better future

We all have the power to choose where we are going in our lives, which road will you take in 2012?

This year had its ups and downs, surely you can agree, but why not celebrate the New Year by learning, letting go to make room for a better future.  Take the good and leave the bad and remember - its only a mistake if you don't learn from it.

Why harbor on the misfortunes of the past, and the mistakes you have made.   Analyse why it happened to prevent it from happening in the future.  Recently, looking back at some of the events that "happened" to me, really were happening because of my attitude.  Oddly enough I found I am the one in the way of my unhappiness and often the cause of it.  With forty around the bend, alot of the "serious" stuff from my youth is water under the bridge.

Sometimes forgiving ourselves and putting pride to the side can relieve a lot of stress!

Life can make us stronger or break us, sometimes looking to the older generation can shed light in the dark areas of our lives. 

Letting go of  your grievances, pain, and fear.  Not allow your past to dictate your future brings hope and joy.  There are times we have to forgive the same person everyday for years, if it will give you peace, then do it.  You are the only person who gets hurt when you dont forgive, let go and move on.  Revenge makes you just like them.  Remember, God see's everything and he is the redemer!  Or Karma if that is your thing.  Personally, my belief is the former and the golden rule - to treat others how I would like to be treated.

You can never go wrong by having faith in people, no matter the outcome.  Losing faith in people seems to take the joy out of relationships.  Expecting greatness in all helps to make the world a better place.  I have never met a cynical person I wanted to befriend.

This is a new year, be the person you admire, change produces change!

So if you wake up to find yourself on the wrong path, take action!  Remember that this is a new year and everyday is a new day and new chance to be the person you admire.  You can get to where you want to be by doing what you have always done, otherwise you would already be there.  Only a change can produce the change you want in your life.  If you want more respect from others, give it to yourself first, then to others.  If you want people to love you, love them.  If you want to be heard, listen.  Simple, really?  Take a good long look in the mirror - would your fourteen year old self be happy with you?

In retrospect, this year has been great, I am alive and can feel joy and happiness everyday.  I have only to look out my window to watch the birds, pet my dog, or spend time with my husband and family to experience the best things in life.

Dreams... A proclamation of Hope

Hope leads you to new horizons....

When I was little, I wanted to be a ballerina, then I "developed" and BOOM, no more ballerina.  Not that it mattered because I was certain that being a veterinarian was definitely what I was going to be.   Then I saw Indian Jones - Raiders of the Lost Ark, and I knew I was going to be an archeologist.  My dream lead me to write National Geographic, and ask what I needed to do to end up having my adventures of being an archeologist published in their magazine, as an employee.  What happened then almost crushed my dreams, they sent back a very discouraging letter, in a nutshell, being a part of their magazine would be nothing short of a miracle and I should choose more main stream studies, instead of archeology.

"Shoot for the moon.
Even if you miss it you will land among the stars."
-  Les Brown

Your dreams are not crazy, in the words of Les Brown,  "Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss it you will land among the stars."either way it will be out of this world!

Never give up on your dreams.  Giving up on dreams, is like letting go of hope.  No you are not silly for having them!  Dreams change as we grow up and discover who we are, life happens, so change happen and dreams change. 

Sticks and Stones . . .

Is your glass half empty of half full?

We have all heard the age old idiom,"Sticks and stones may break my bones.... but words will never hurt me." - a very hard lesson to learn. This saying seems to be lost in todays world where we take offense at the slightest remark.  A very good friend, a "tough love" and "call it as I see it" friend offended me mightily until I learned this.

While complaining about how horrible and terribly wrong my own world was, she always said,"Only because you allow it to be."  Taken aback, I thought how rude, how dare she judge me, and my young mind went in many directions, and out of friendship I kept my mouth shut.  How? When? Why? What? Was she saying that the reason there was so much chaos in my world was because I allowed it?!? No! Who would want this?  Certainly not me! No way! She was so wrong and I was going to prove it!

Turning her comment over and over in my mind I tried to find fault with it.  Days turned to weeks and months, I did not call her, or return her calls.  I was certain she was wrong, and she had no idea why I was avoiding her. She came over to confront me, calling me out on the carpet.  Already feeling guilty by avoiding her and rudely not returning her calls, I let her have it, all of my thoughts on the matter.

She wasted no time setting the record straight.  "If some one calls you a name, do you believe it?"  I stammered.  She bulldozed forward, "Well?  Anyone can call you a name, if they call you something nasty - is it true just because they said it?  How about whore?"  Still stammering, I replied, "no?" 

"NO!"  she said, "Not, no?  Everyone has their own problems, but you can CHOOSE to be a victim or not.  You can CHOOSE to take offense or not, You can CHOOSE to have a horrible and terrible life because sooo much is happening to you, or you can CHOOSE a happy life, 'cause it's your life, and the other is no longer an option."

You can CHOOSE to have a horrible and terrible life,

because sooo much is happening to you,

or you can CHOOSE a happy life,

'cause it's your life, and the other is no longer an option."

Easy words for her to say I think, like she know what I am going through! 

"You don't believe me?  @#$(*@!," she says, "Is that true? Are you a @#$(*!?"

"NO!" I yell back.

"That's right, your not.  You are not a victim, a bad person, or any of those other things, but how will anyone believe those things if you don't start believing them first?  Don't be a victim in your life, take control over it, don't let others control you, we have control over one person in this world, and that is ourselves, and the way we think and how react to this world.  Don't let anyone, including me, steal your joy."

"We all have problems, some have ex's, or loss, a number of things can go wrong, but don't give in to it, don't give them that power over you and the way that you think, never give in to them."

Well now, that was a lot to take in at once, I have a choice to be happy? No matter what is happening in my life?  So simple, yet complex, and why didn't someone tell me this before?  My life and that of my children's lives were forever changed by my friends tough love, "it's your choice."  To this day, my kids often quote,"Today, I have a choice to be happy or sad (mad, victimized, etc..), and I choose happiness."

Visiting with childhood friends bring perspective!

Social networking on line can rekindle friendships, over coffee.... and bring new hope to your life.

We enjoyed Tully's coffee in Tacoma, WA.

My friend and I found each other online and "friend-ed" each other.  Her profile picture was always of her eyes, which have always seem to penetrate my soul.  Years pass with hardly a word, then she was "on-line" and I messaged her, thanking her for our childhood friendship, and less then a week later we are drinking coffee at Tully's in my home town. 

Sometimes reflecting where you have been can help us along life's path.  Recently a childhood friendship was rekindled, and the outcome was life changing.  Interestingly, people always remember things from their own perspective, and getting a different perspective can help "center" us in the chaotic world we live in.  Funny, I always felt misunderstood and a misfit in my own skin.  Meeting up with someone who knew me in my youth recharged my spirit. 

We both ended up having similar health issues, relationships and oddly enough retained the same outlook at life.  The six hours we spent went beyond reminiscing, we quickly found so much in common that I nearly missed my train back home!   We picked up as if the twenty years had never passed, astonished at what we had gone through and delighted that we once found our friendship still intact.  "Well, isn't that what you always wanted to do?" response to my heartfelt desire to be a writer seemed to stop the earth from turning.  Wide eyed and more than a little startled to find understanding, love, and friendship staring back at me.

To have friends, one must first be a friend.  - from someone smarter than me.

Strange how time creates a distance between friends, but it does not change the starting point.  Looking back to see where you have been can clarify where you are going.  We decided to make every effort to have coffee frequently.

Are you getting what you want out of life?

Is the sun setting again, and your life is still not the way you want it?

It is your life, are you getting what you want out of it?  Are you enjoying good health?  Do you have the material items you want?  Is the sun setting again and your life is still not the way you want it?  Are there many things you would change if you could?  Stop. Don't make excuses.  It is your life, so live it.

If you don't like the way your life is then, change.  Wait, don't do anything drastic!  There are ways to get what you want out of life without starving yourself, ruining your marriage, or robbing a bank.  You have all the power, you are in charge of yourself, and the way you think.  So, change the way you think. 

Choose to be Happy!
Wait, it's not that easy... did you know you can get "happy" naturally by eating right and exercising?  You can become happier by sharing your thoughts and desires with a loved one?  Sounds simple, but have you tried it?


Look at what you have and not what you don't have.  Life is what you make it.  No one can take away your joy.  You always have a choice to be happy, no matter what the circumstances.  You are a survivor, not a victim, unless you choose to be.  Take the focus off of yourself, open your eyes and look around, you were given many gifts and abilities so use them!  If you love to paint, then do it!  Your not that good?  Compared to what?  Volunteer with youth or seniors and help them paint.  This isn't about painting, it's about you going out there and doing what you want.

There is no time like the present. You didn't grow up having a silverspoon, so what! Very few did!  If you love horses, and don't have the money for them, then volunteer at the local horse therapy group, they are always in need of volunteers.  What you don't have experience?  They have a place for you, and can give you the experience you need!

The internet is full of FREE resources, to help you get what you want out of life.

DON'T TAKE MY WORD for it, LOOK IT UP!

 Inspirational Links:
Josh Groban's performace of YOUR STILL YOU 
Josh Turner - The Long Black Train
True Insights
Life by Design 


You Raise me Up - Josh Groban


Idea Links:
Oprah Magazine - How Magic Lists help you get what you want

http://steve-olson.com/7-ways-to-get-what-you-want-from-life/

http://presentoutlook.com/how-to-get-what-you-want-in-life/

Options you may not have even considered:
How Starbucks save this mans life - CNN link 

13 Healthy Habits to improve you life - from WebMD 

The Secrets behind the ten happiest jobs 

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/34417749/ns/today-books/t/how-eating-right-can-make-you-happy/

Can exercise make you happy?


Be inspired:
“Never give in, never give in, never; never; never; never - in nothing, great or small, large or petty - never give in except to convictions of honor and good sense” - Winston Churchill



More to come... we have only just begun today.  There is so much you can do today to make the changes you want to get the life you want.